The discursive construction of love

The discursive construction of love…

I am writing this blog post with some mixed feelings. I have spent many hours of my life exploring discourse on love when I could have explored current topics such as discourse on Brexit or discourse on disease (coronavirus). But may be love is a universal phenomenon that is worth exploring anyway. There were two aims for my blog post which seemed pretty straightforward: first, I would like to explore if there is such a thing as discourse on love (e.g. recurrent themes, images and metaphors) and second, if so, what characteristics of this discourse might be?

For the purposes of this blog post, I am using a sample of Egyptian songs. I chose Egyptian songs to examine due to my close affinity with the Egyptian culture, which will facilitate the understanding of love songs. Second, Egyptian media outputs seem to have popularity outside Egypt for example, in the Gulf, and in neighbouring Arabic-majority speaking countries. Third, since Egyptian songs are mediated on YouTube, such a global medium, I am intrigued to find out the images of love that lyrics’ writers in Egypt might be exporting to the “world”. I would like to add that as I enjoy listening to Egyptian songs, I have listened to English songs for many years and what I have written below is indirectly informed by this comparison. I am hoping to find out what might be unique about contemporary love songs in Egypt.

I would like to dedicate this post to a few people: to my mother (who is not physically with me in this world now), to my students at the Faculty of Education at Fayoum University with whom I explored -some time ago - metaphors used in love songs. I would like also to dedicate this blog post to Prof. Ola Hafez, my MA supervisor and to Distinguished Prof. Ruth Wodak and Dr Shuruq Naguib, who supervised my doctorate research at Lancaster University. I know it is perhaps unusual to dedicate blog posts, tweets or notes. But it is OK. I am imagining the world now a big room with digital walls and ceilings that feature tweets, info-graphics and blog posts (which could be dedicated). Here we go. 

In Egyptian songs, Love inhabits the heart...and the eyes as well

Words, images and symbols 

In Egyptian Arabic and in English too, it is very common to use phrases such as “in my heart I believe or in my heart I can see that”. These phrases are common because we tend to think of the heart as the home to feelings and emotions. We take this for granted although we now know that it is the brain (rather than the heart) that is responsible for generating feelings, as signals are sent to the body through the brain. Anyway, this rhetorical image of the heart as the place of love is further developed in Egyptian songs; the heart is frequently anthropomorphised (given human qualities) and becomes a key social actor in love's representation. The following examples dwell on the idea that there is a struggle between the lover and their heart.

Example 1

 I tried to stay away from you. But I couldn't. My heart cried and drove me crazy.

حاولت أبعد بعيد عنك وما عرفش حاولت كتير لكن قلبى بكى منى وحنني

Example 2

Why and how come my heart fell in love? What happened to it? All of a sudden, my heart loved your soul and is now at a loss. What happened to it?

إزاي ليه قلبي بيحبك، معقول، إيه مالوا، إيه جرالوا؟ 

كده فجأه روحه فيك وألاقي بين إيديك حالي حالو إيه جرالوا؟

Example 3

Your heart has woken me up. It hugged me and made me its life and soul. 

قلبك صحانى على صوت  دقاته ضمني خلاني روحو وحياته

Example 4

Why? Why have you fallen in love again my heart? What can I do with you now, (when) you cannot hide your feelings?

إيه إيه بس إللي رماك تعشق تاني يا قلبي؟ اعمل ايه وياك ما بتقدرش تخبي

   The heart in the above examples make love a powerful concept. The heart brought about material 
and emotional states e.g. it “drove the lover crazy”, "made the lover forget whom they are"  and in example 1 and example 4, the heart overrode the lover's will of not falling in love. In example 3, the heart is described as a super power through the mention of "life" and "soul". Just like the heart, the eyes are a "big deal" in Egyptian songs. I wish I was an archaeologist to say something about how love was talked about in ancient Egypt, and if this has anything to do with the recurrent reference to the eyes of the beloved/lover in Egyptian songs. Well, I will show you first some examples, before explaining how the recurrent reference to the eyes could have a historical background to it. :.. .     .  

Example 5

Your eyes were able to love ...They made me forget who I am after they hugged me

يا عيون قادرين ع الهوا و خدوني 

نسوني أنا مين بعد ما حضنوني 

Example 6

Your eyes brighten up the world in front of me

نظرة عينيك بتنور الدنيا في عينيا

Example 7 

Send my regards to your eyes till we meet

سلم لي على عينيك لاتنين ده لحد ما نتقابل

The eyes are referred to in three different ways in the above examples. In example 5, the eyes seem to be a super-power that hugged the lover and made the lover forget whom they are. Example 6 -metaphorically- draws on the eyes “as a source of light that brightens up the world”. In example 7, the eyes refer to the beloved, i.e. send my regards to you/your eyes till we meet (and therefore is a metonymy). Going back to ancient Egypt, it could be that the fascination with the eyes in Egyptian songs has historical roots to it. In ancient Egyptian mythology, there are the Eyes of Horus, a symbol of protection, royal power and good will. Just as a small proof of the popularity of the Eyes of Horus as a visual symbol in contemporary modern Egypt is that you could perhaps find it sold as a pendant in jewellery/silver shops in a similar way to Nefertiti's iconic bust. Many of the schools in Egypt decorate their brick fences with ancient Egyptian images and symbols, the Eyes of Horus being one of them. I mean, "the eyes" (as a social actor) in Egyptian songs could be a re-contextualisation or an appropriation of past discourses about protection, power and royalty (which the Eyes of Horus symbolised). 

Having explained these two images in love songs, of the heart and the eyes, I now move on to explore key themes and figures of speech in the sample of song I examined.

 Key themes and figures of speech 

I found that there are three broad themes in love songs: a) celebrating love and its beauty b) describing separation and its pain c) unrequited love. Here are some examples: 

Example 8 (celebrating love) 

I think I am in love with you

I am in love with the world that always smiles when I am with you

باين حبيت حبيت الدنيا إللي بتضحكلي معاك علاطول

Example 9 (describing separation) 

I don't get upset when you cross my mind 

The more I think about you I realise

There was nothing in our past that says we could be together

ما بزعلش أما بفتكرك ، بلاقي كل ما اتأمل ماضينا ما كنش فيه حاجة تقول إن إحنا حنكمل 

Example 10 (unrequited love)

You crossed my mind a few days ago

I thought I would ask about you

Between you and me, I cannot forget the days I had with you and I keep missing you(r eyes)

جيت على بالى كده من كام يوم قولت اما اسأل فينك وكلام بينى وبينك مقدرش انسى ايامى معاك وبتوحشنى عينيك

ًWhile the first two examples (about love and separation) are self-explanatory, I find the theme of “unrequited love” more interesting and intriguing. This is because the assumption made here is that the “lovers” are possibly distant and will remain so. But if this is the case, how does love drive its force? In example 10, love is legitimised (= made plausible and real) through the invocation of memories which, you could argue, act as an argument. The premise here is that: if we have memories of someone, it means we are likely not to forget them, or will keep thinking about them (also see below on arguments in love songs). 

For now, though, here is a list of the conceptual domains through which love was talked about in the examples I examined:

• Love as a source of light

The sunlight is your forehead

نور الشمس نور جبينك

Your light came and guided me

نورك هل وهداني (طيفك بحر وسقاني)

• Love as magic 

Oh the magic in her eyes 

ياه على سحر عيونها يا

• Love as a thought/ a dream

ُI think of you and my dream about you travels up in the sky

بفكر بيك وحلمي بيك بيعلى في الفضا أعلى

• Love as freedom (or a new beginning)

Oh my heart who fell in love like a bird that is free and flies in the sky

حبيبي يا عاشق يا حر زي الطير 

• Love as a journey

I travelled countries and walked wide and far and I found your picture in my heart

• Love as something that is spatially higher and relates to the semantic field of space e.g.sky, moon, clouds and stars

Let them count the stars, and sing for the beautiful night, my love is like the sunlight and does not need more songs/singing

ما يعدوا نجوم الليل و يغنوا يا عيني يا ليل أنا حبي باين لك زي الشمس ومش محتاج 

• Interestingly, love is also described as a speech act, saying "beautiful words":

I think as if I am with you now. I tell you and you tell me more beautiful words

(بافكر فيك و حلمي بيك بيعلى في الفضا أعلي) بافكر فيك كأني معاك بقولك وانت بتقولى كلام أجمل 

• Love as a drawing

Teach my heart and draw in it, my love for you has begun; just acknowledge it

علمي علمي في القلب ارسمي الحب ابتدى ليكي وسلمي

• On a negative note, love is described as a scar, or stereotypically as "fire" (e.g. check Johnny Cash's song "I fell into a ring of fire").

Example: They asked me: choose between heaven and fire? And I chose your fire    

قالوا اختار بين جنة ونار اخترت أنا نارك

Argumentation and legitimisation strategies  

If love is not represented as a powerful phenomenon by means of the images and figures of speech discussed above, it is also legitimised or de-legitimised through arguments. Some of these arguments 

legitimise (or are in favour of) love. Some are in favour of separation. Here are some examples.

Legitimising love

I have loved you for years 

As a statement/claim: “I have loved you for years” occurred in one song mayyal which leads to the conclusion that since I have loved you for a long time, then my love to you is “true/real”. I also came across argument from years in a famous English song (last Christmas) in which the lyrics read: "well, it has been a year, it does not surprise me". 

Love as a teacher 

Interestingly, love/the lover is described as a teacher. The following example is from a song called "biscuits" (by Simone):

So you think hearts are biscuits...Will melt straight away? 

 I will teach you how to stop asking why...

And I will remind you -in case you forget- that you have to show kindness and compassion

هي القلوب عندك بسكوت تدوب أوام من غير كلام

حعلمك ما تقولش إزاي

وافكرك لتكون نساي إن الحنان لازم يبان

Another example is from a song by Diab called "teach my heart" or "allem alby":

Teach my heart how to love. Talk to me and say the best words. Live with me in my dreams and love me. 

علم قلبي الغرام، كلمني أحلى الكلام ، عيش معايا في الأحلام، يا حبيبي حبني

I find the concept of “love as a teacher” quite unique and interesting. Why would love songs  integrate a bit of discourse on education in which love is talked about as an act of teaching and learning? I have at least two things to say here. The Egyptian social (class) system seems to adopt educational certificates as part of its structure (for example, when you introduce yourself to someone, you would probably say what you have studied rather than what you do). Add to this is that teachers, as a matter of fact, tend to have authority, a psychological one I mean (e.g. respect, gratitude etc.). In this world view, if you teach the person you love or vice versa (they teach you), it means that love here has more authority and is powerful.  

Legitimising separation

We have had good memories and that is enough 

This argument is used in one song called “te2dar tetkalem” and can be paraphrased as: “since we have had good memories (that is enough) and we can now part”. 

We have to live our lives. Life has to move on

Another argument that is used to justify separation is that we need to “live” our lives. This can be paraphrased as: "since we cannot be together, it is OK if we separate since life has to move on or since we have to live our lives".    

Representation of love: myth or reality?

I am coming now to the end of this rather long blog post so bear with me (if you can, ha ha). As I thought of this blog post, I thought of it as a challenge really, of sitting back, and revisiting and assessing love songs which I quite liked and took them for granted. I was hoping to critique and assess discourse on love. Yet I find myself pausing at one bit and one question: Is love really powerful, transformative and enlightening? Or is it just a myth, something similar to magic in the Middle Ages in which people mistakenly believed in it?

Still, if I shovel this above question through the door, and revisit the examples I examined, I am not sure if love is represented in a positive or a negative light. While love for example is described as transformative and enlightening via images of love as a source of light that guides the lover, as magic and as transcendental through linking it to objects of space, love is also dramatised as struggle. It is made authoritative via the power of the heart and the eyes and through images of being “at a loss” or having a “scar” or as a dramatic choice between “heaven and hell”. If you internalise this aspect of representation,  you could perhaps experience feelings of love not as a positive force but as a hurdle, an impending doom on your brain and heart? To add, popular love songs- as with the sample I examined- rarely talk about anything other than love being a creative space, for example, they rarely talk about gender assumptions or differences in cultures. They seem to be geared at constructing an enjoyable, aesthetic and a dramatic representation of love that would perhaps sell songs, make the listener feel good, well-engaged or persuaded, till another song plays.